Without this talented studio assistant, famous artist Court Painter would never complete his masterpieces
AHM is seen caught like a deer in the headlights of elusive fame.
Editors note: Copyright issues allow only one painting to be reproduced in this expose behind the studio curtain.
Many would be surprised to visit the studio of contemporary artist Court Painter and see how his art is made and who it’s made by. Here, surprisingly we will find one poorly paid studio assistant mixing raw pigments, wielding a variety of brushes and loaded palette, whirling and stabbing at the canvas in the act of completing yet another painting, happy accidents and all, awaiting the signature of Court Painter who alone declares it worthy and saleable.
Art fabrication as with this behind the curtain expose ,can be the process of hiring cheap labour to produce large ,small and complex artworks. Cheap labour, like AHM who also serves as Court Painter’s press attache , has wide-ranging skills in fine art & forgery production and is employed by Court Painter to execute portrait commissions of celebrities and political figures.
AHM catching a lunch break in what prove to be 14 hour days in the studio
A Hardon MacKay, penniless and having migrated from a small hard scrabble, potato producing island on the east coast of the Great Dominion, found himself in a new province where no one knew his name or sordid past. AHM ,knowing which way the winds of the art world were blowing, got a job with local art hero and soon to become an international super art star, Court Painter. So, over the past 7 years, AHM has fabricated CP’s commissions on canvas with adroitness , speed and devoid of painterly error. For one of CP’s most famous projects, a series of portraits of a well-known political family and the husband’s mistress, AHM was paid $50 US per portrait as dozens were produced and shoved out the studio door.
Court Painter seen signing an approved work with shy assistant AHM
AHM’s technical proficiency and speed as a painter were essential to the success of this series since the husband lost the presidency of his home country and was denounced by his mistress. AHM’s value to CP is perfectly captured by a statement CP made to the Inglewood Community Blog, “If I had to be doing this myself, I wouldn’t be able to live the leisurely life style I’ve become accustomed or be able to hire the shadiest accounting firms to advise on the best off shore tax havens to shelter my considerable earnings.”
Court Painter allows one glass of wine for assistant AHM as he celebrates latest haul on the back of AHM
According to a mole at one art fabrication company who prefers to remain anonymous, contemporary artists like Court Painter have financial ruthlessness, old time shady management skills and voracious carnal appetites. Most importantly , they have grandiose ideas and the funds to realize them. “The successful ones are scrooges with money: getting it and using it to satisfy their carnal appetites,” he said. “They’re predatory pricing types as well as artists.” In the case of Court Painter working with poorly paid studio assistants like AHM ,frees up his time to have languid leisurely liquid lunches on a daily basis, long naps and late afternoon to closing time visits to The Ship & Anchor pub where he holds…wait for it….court!
Court Painter seen counting his money in the studio reading room accompanied by AHM and unpaid studio intern
Court Painter is known as one of the most prolific users of cheap art labour. According to an article by art critic and muckraker Dinger Bell of the Calgary Sun, AHM revealed “I resented being paid 50 loonies to do a painting that would fetch $500,000, and in an act of rebellion, I inserted mini cameras in the eyes of the portraits that follow the intimate antics of the painted patrons around the room and not even Court Painter picked up on this subterfuge.”
Ending on an upbeat note, AHM indicated he was working on an illustrated coffee table book “The Art of Compromising Positions” featuring images chosen from the treasure trove collection of celebrities and politicians in compromising positions exposed in an exciting variety of settings and flattering light conditions…covertly streamed to his computer from the all seeing mini cameras surreptitiously inserted in the eyes of the portraits.
Oh, so wicked!
