Category: Images

Artist Charged With Alteration of Hollywood Sign

The Hollywood sign in Los Angeles was altered on July. 1. Celebrity artist Court Painter admitted to changing the sign and turned himself in to the authorities.

Court Painter, a senior artist, more recently recognized as a rental dancer for local arts fundraisers, surrendered on Monday with his Press Attache at his side, according to the Los Angeles Police Department. He was booked on a misdemeanor trespassing charge and released on bail.

Court Painter receives award for having the best golden bald head.(golden globe…get it…)

The sign was changed about 3 a.m. on July 1, when the letters of Hollywood were obscured by paper sheets and turned into the letters spelling out COURT PAINTER. It remained that way throughout the morning before the sign was restored.

In a phone interview, Court Painter said he considered the results more of an art installation and marketing opportunity than a prank. He produced a hand printed letter in support of his action authored by his Press Attache who nevertheless refused to identify himself because of “being deeply embarrassed by his letter”.

Press Attache AHM appeared in court quite befuddled by the proceedings.

“Yeah, I broke the rules, but I broke it with good spirit and good intentions,” he shouted on Tuesday. “It was just to bring light and positivity and happiness and publicity for my cause which is “Make Court Painter Acceptable Again.”

Court Painter appeared in court doing his best David Letterman vibe!

“Art Pranks of this nature deplete the resources of our valuable public safety personnel, in both responding to the prank and in responding to the increased crowds and copycat attempts that these incidents generate,” an authority said in a statement on Monday.

“My office has urged the city attorney and L.A.P.D. to investigate and prosecute this case, as well as all attempts to trespass near, alter, or vandalize the sign.”

Court Painter is expected to appear in court on July. 15. He said he had been inspired by a similar alteration in 1976, and that he had used clamps and sheets so as not to damage the sign.

“I don’t want to destroy anything,” he said. “I’m about peace and love and respect and integrity and a lot of things that in some ways are missing these days. I wanted to show there’s a light in the world as well as in a number of my paintings which incidentally are on sale as we speak.”

Court Painter said he had been told he could face up to six months in jail. He said he saw that as excessive for a “harmless” art project, but asked if he would receive old copies of Canadian Art in his cell.

“I’m a person of integrity,if I do something wrong, I will own up to it. Please send me home to Calgary and I promise never to come back.”

His begging and weeping melted the hearts of all authorities present and Court Painter was allowed to return to the safety of his Inglewood , Alberta single car garage studio.

Court Painter Is Great Because He Doesn’t Brag About Being Great

This article was read and approved by Court Painter 

Last week cemented Court Painter’s status as an international darling. He topped the New York Times’ list of the “52 Artist Studios to Go Visit in 2017” and was lauded in the Guardian for being one of the only portraitists that touts diversity over nativism in his choice of subjects.

In 2016, the media fawned over Court Painter. The Economist ran a cover story titled: “Court Painter Example to the Art World” and his fax machine became so overheated it crashed on the night of the U.S. election.It’s still a mystery why these two events are related however Court Painter’s middle name is mystery.

For an art celebrity who historically has been known as a wallflower, the attention is long overdue. But he shouldn’t become “braggadocious” and let his Great Dominion ego inflate. In short: He shouldn’t become an American celebrity. Court Painter has become so popular internationally precisely because of his humility.

As the preeminent political portraitist of the Great Dominion, it means he must strive to improve instead of thumping his chest about past artistic accomplishments.
So many people are obsessed with status. At art parties many Americans trot out their exhibition credentials before asking about Court Painter. While it’s impossible to make generalizations about an entire country, many astute art observers have witnessed the entitled American artist who cuts in line at an art reception or loudly criticizes the timid and somewhat vaporous brush strokes of Court Painter while being completely uniformed of his local however modest reputation.

The U.S. art celebrity scene is a place with clearly defined values — individualism, capitalism, success — which has helped make it the most powerful art scene in the world. But those values have also made America a place with unaffordable 24″x 24″ oil on aluminum Big Dot paintings and one of the highest levels of income inequality between potters and painters on Earth.

By contrast, one of the greatest Court Painter qualities is self deception ..oops…self-deprecation. Mocking himself with his cowboy hat turned the wrong way during the Stampede or clutching some faux award he claims to have received, makes him more accessible and his self-doubt is, he insists, a sign of intelligence. As a bright person with a ruddy complexion he brags the posssessing of a full compliment of palette knives in the drawer plus a full palette although admits grudgingly that he may have a wee knowledge gap and that there may be some hipster painter smarter than he. It means Court Painter just strives to improve instead of thumping his sunken chest about past portrait accomplishments or his irresistable way with the art world ladies.

“Court Painter exceptionalism” simply is a term only used in his studio among raptly attentive studio assistants. However it’s only in the past few years some politicians have dared to call Court Painter publicly the best darned portrait painter in the Great Dominion, according to the National Post which also claims itself to be the best financially managed free rag in the country .

Court Painter has become a great art celebrity because of slick marketing and a brand recognition roll out led by his charismatic Press Attache A Hardon MacKay and he doesn’t boast about being great….Court Painter that is!

Let’s hope all the recent attention doesn’t go to his head like another Calgary artist we know.

Image (above) is a fake and reportedly fabricated by a Russian hacker utilizing the  Photoshop method which we all know is used extensively in fashion magazines to make fake boobs, make up news and stuff like that.

Image(below) is an authentic picture of Court Painter and celebrity friend ‘The Unknown Comic’ during his recent Book Tour.

 

Front Page National Post Panic Piece: Where O Where Is Our Prime Minister…it’s 2017 don’t you know!

 

Former Rock Star Court Painter Downgraded to “regular face painter”

BY GERRY NICHOLLS : ART CRITIC POSTMEDIA 

Editor’s note: This is Mr. Nicholl’s first attempt at switching from partisan political commentary to covering an art celebrity in a piece that we applaud for being wonderfully barbed and dripping in thinly veiled contempt.

Seeing Court Painter get slammed with negative media coverage is like watching the Good Ship Lollipop get torpedoed in the waters of Peppermint Bay.

It’s startling to behold, since Court Painter’s “sugar and spice” art celebrity persona has always seemed to guarantee him media attention that alternates somewhere between fawning and adulatory.

In fact, up until the last few weeks, the closest we got to anything resembling a hard-hitting art media analysis of Court Painter were news stories focused on his choice of smokes and bad jokes at art openings.

But that’s changing now, as art journalists like myself are starting to highlight and expose certain cynical painting practices and tactics of the Court Painter , a trend which has had the effect of making the preeminent political portrait painter of the Great Dominion appear less like a paragon of idealism and more like – horror of horrors – a regular face painter.

And for Court Painter, who rose to power in the art world largely based on his status as a semi-divine, rock-star-style, cute-as-a-button art celebrity who would magically usher in an era of undiluted joy and happiness, being downgraded to the level of “regular face painter” is indeed a serious public relations setback. A Hardon MacKay his Press Attache is reportedly wetting his Prada pants.

Of course, Court Painter has no one to blame but himself for this state of affairs since his communication strategy of late has been more muddled than A Hardon MacKay’s official biography.

To show you what I mean, let’s look at how the Court Painter should have handled some recent controversies.

1. Bad Portrait Protests

What Court Painter Did

Court Painter seemed to be threatening these bad portrait protestors when he declared, “If people choose for their own reasons not to be peaceful, then I, through my martial art defence moves will ensure that my fans and unpaid studio interns will be kept safe.”

Hardly, the sort of comment we expect from the Court Painter regime, with its unofficial motto of “Cuddles Forever”.

What Court Painter Studio Should Have Done

Court Painter should have assured citizens of the great Dominion that good portrait painting would be guarded by a special new elite aesthetic unit, known as the “Sunny Ways Aesthetic Division,” a highly trained force which would subdue ‘I know what I like’ protesters with the latest in Yoga relaxation techniques.

2. Portrait Reform

What Court Painter Did

After taking the stance that amazingly popular art celebrities like Court Painter don’t need to keep his promise to introduce glitter in his portraits, has seemingly  backed away from this pledge recorded on a live mike to reform and juice up the Great Dominion’s portraiture materials.

What Court Painter Should Have Done

Court Painter should have announced he would keep his promise on portrait material reform by making online voting for the Best Darn Portrait Painter in the Land a priority, after he consulted the world’s leading expert on cyber elections and equestrian portraits: Vladimir Putin.

3. Praising Chris Cran

What Court Painter Did

Court Painter made himself into something of an international joke when he inexplicably heaped effusive praise on his main competitor and art celebrity nemesis.

What Court Painter Should Have Done

Court Painter should have honoured Cran with actions instead of words by traversing the shark-infested waters of the Elbow River separating Inglewood and Calgary on a leaky raft, while smock-less. Imagine the selfies!

(Editors note: Although the writer’s suggestion is downright stupid and lacking in cliche cleverness, we have decided to let it stand since it measures up to most art writing standards)

4. Pay to Play in the Studio Sandbox

What Court Painter Did

Court Painter set up exclusive soirees where, in exchange for a hefty donation of beer and cigarettes, corporate bigwigs could hobnob with Court Painter and even try out his #3 sable hair brush.

What Court Painter Should Have Done

Holding these soirees is fine, but the Court Painter studio should have held them in the British Columbia wilderness, where the attending billionaires would only catch a glimpse of a near-naked Court Painter, as he cavorted while sketching chipmunks and squirrels.

My point is, when it comes to Court Painter’s media strategy, cuteness conquers all.

Editors Note: We think Mr. Nicholl’s first time effort at covering an art celebrity of Court Painter’s stature is well intentioned however too long and the ending is really lame! Perhaps he should stick with political commentary where the bar is much lower and POSTMEDIA is sure to publish. 

Naked Ambition (Kevin O’Leary)

&

A Public Servant (Premier Rachel Notley)