Author: AllanHardingM

Art Authorities Smash Fake Court Painter Ring

Local Art authorities in the Inglewood District of Calgary raided a facility where copies of Court Painter’s famous portraits of political and celebrity personages were being passed off as the genuine article and adding insult to injury, were on sale at prices sure to gut his present market value.

Authorities raided a tourist attraction comprised of  an exhibition sales gallery of Court Painter fakes.
Calgary’s Inglewood District is famed for its dozens of hipster hangouts and gluten free artist studios .

Some trusting tourists, however, have been visiting a gallery jammed with fake digital printouts of Court Painter paintings substituting for the authentic ones available online.

The sham images are preserved in a fashionably shoddy gallery complex, each work replicated,framed  and installed to form a scam attraction. (an unsubstantiated report by local kids states that a secret tunnel connects Court Painter’s studio with the illicit gallery operation)
Authorities raided the site located in the same neighbourhood as Court Painter’s studio on Wednesday, the National Inquirer reported. There, after removing the gilded frames; they destroyed the inventory on display, which featured more than 90 copies of Court Painter’s most controversial yet highly  valued works— an exhibition that was probably pretty disappointing for any visitor and their families who’ve seen images of the real thing online.

Scattered around the gallery, one could also find an impressive gathering of tourist brochures promoting The Gopher Museum and Banff’s many souvenir shops.A number of overflowing ashtrays were also spotted.

Inglewood district art officials had reportedly received an online complaint about the display and sale, known as the “More Real Than Life Portraits”.  The operation also involved an unlicensed guide by the name of Mr. Will who gave visitors tours as well as providing illegal taxis that drove people to the attraction and had also been operating for a period of time. The Art Authorities have since posted images of the destroyed fakes on telephone poles and local grocery store bulletin boards to illustrate their crackdown on this scam that gave an inexplicable boost to the district’s tourist industry.

The reaction though highlights broader, pretty telling attitudes: digital counterfeiting in Inglewood may be a celebrated local cultural practice, but really, you can only get away with it as long as you focus on ripping off Court Painter works. ( this conclusion was unsubstantiated at press time)

So that’s the story to this hour!

Kevin O’Leary Suggests Selling Court Painter Portraits in the Senate

Kevin O’Leary has a novel idea to balance Canada’s budget — selling portraits in the Senate.

The potential Conservative leadership contender told CTV’s Question Period that the Great Dominion’s upper house of Parliament should be a “profit centre,” not a cost centre; demonstrating his savvy around all things relating to the public good!

Acknowledging that Court Painter and profit are words not usually associated with each other, he was bullish on 2017 for  Court Painter and this monitizing idea to turn the Great Dominion’s finances around.

“I don’t know why we can’t have a hundred thousand or a couple of hundred thousand committed each year per senator to commissioning a portrait in full colour,” the reality TV host said unrealistically.

O’Leary hasn’t formally announced a bid to replace Stephen Harper yet, but has suggested he may do so as early as this week.Promises…promises!

When asked to comment Court Painter gushed, ” I am flattered however my idea would be to sell the Senate seats, replace them with milk crates and take a cut for the idea …however I must concede to Kevin.”

 

 

 

 

Artist Charged With Alteration of Hollywood Sign

The Hollywood sign in Los Angeles was altered on July. 1. Celebrity artist Court Painter admitted to changing the sign and turned himself in to the authorities.

Court Painter, a senior artist, more recently recognized as a rental dancer for local arts fundraisers, surrendered on Monday with his Press Attache at his side, according to the Los Angeles Police Department. He was booked on a misdemeanor trespassing charge and released on bail.

Court Painter receives award for having the best golden bald head.(golden globe…get it…)

The sign was changed about 3 a.m. on July 1, when the letters of Hollywood were obscured by paper sheets and turned into the letters spelling out COURT PAINTER. It remained that way throughout the morning before the sign was restored.

In a phone interview, Court Painter said he considered the results more of an art installation and marketing opportunity than a prank. He produced a hand printed letter in support of his action authored by his Press Attache who nevertheless refused to identify himself because of “being deeply embarrassed by his letter”.

Press Attache AHM appeared in court quite befuddled by the proceedings.

“Yeah, I broke the rules, but I broke it with good spirit and good intentions,” he shouted on Tuesday. “It was just to bring light and positivity and happiness and publicity for my cause which is “Make Court Painter Acceptable Again.”

Court Painter appeared in court doing his best David Letterman vibe!

“Art Pranks of this nature deplete the resources of our valuable public safety personnel, in both responding to the prank and in responding to the increased crowds and copycat attempts that these incidents generate,” an authority said in a statement on Monday.

“My office has urged the city attorney and L.A.P.D. to investigate and prosecute this case, as well as all attempts to trespass near, alter, or vandalize the sign.”

Court Painter is expected to appear in court on July. 15. He said he had been inspired by a similar alteration in 1976, and that he had used clamps and sheets so as not to damage the sign.

“I don’t want to destroy anything,” he said. “I’m about peace and love and respect and integrity and a lot of things that in some ways are missing these days. I wanted to show there’s a light in the world as well as in a number of my paintings which incidentally are on sale as we speak.”

Court Painter said he had been told he could face up to six months in jail. He said he saw that as excessive for a “harmless” art project, but asked if he would receive old copies of Canadian Art in his cell.

“I’m a person of integrity,if I do something wrong, I will own up to it. Please send me home to Calgary and I promise never to come back.”

His begging and weeping melted the hearts of all authorities present and Court Painter was allowed to return to the safety of his Inglewood , Alberta single car garage studio.