Calgary Sun’s Vanguard Move

In a stunning editorial move The Calgary Sun has decided to be the go to publication for Calgary art  commentary and criticism. Speaking on condition of anonymity the editorial team acknowledged that evidence based art journalism was too hard and that popularizing art commentary by embracing  public opinion and vernacular expertise was a win win for the paper and readers alike. Polls show everyone is fed up with art experts spending tax dollars and getting in the way of common sense and personal taste.

“From now on Opinion Rules the Roost!” Dinger was quoted as blurting!

Rick”Dinger” Bell has been appointed the Sun’s official Art Rage-er, a first for a newspaper already known for its vanguard ventures!

The editorial page will be fully devoted to lead art editorials shining a light on the next art outrage, everyday run of the mill uninformed common ordinary people’s opinions, Sunday Special Hobby Rage articles and I Know What I Like poems that rhyme.

A feature being introduced is The Sunshine Artist,a remake of the sexist …sorry… sexy Sunshine Girl. The rebrand should prove to be a favourite of the common tax payer, none other than local art celebrity and Inglewood fixture Court Painter.

His Press Attache A Hardon MacKay, in conversation with newly minted Sun Art Rage-er Rick “Dinger” Bell , lauded the Sun “for their brave editorial decision to embrace the common man and a few women’s art commentary , to  advance and give voice to the everyday and the common,untainted by ‘informed know it alls’ and ‘the cultural school of expert fools’.”

Court Painter in his wisdom summed it up with a statement that’s a real keeper, ‘Metaphor is the last refuge of the art scoundrel.’ Ain’t that pretty now!

Court Painter was reluctant to state an opinion on the latest Calgary public art projects stating,” I am a painter not an opinionist”. However when prodded about what public art he would create if given half a million buckaroos,he waxed on about his getting ideas from dreams not like other artists who steal ideas from art books and periodicals and in some cases even take lessons. Pushed a bit further he admitted a vision was forming that , although not fully formed, appeared to be a giant blue circle with two tiny ears that light up on the top.

He said he would only accept a public commission as long as he could keep the entire fee and cut out all the workers and services that end up being paid like drunken sailors…fabricators, project managers, engineers, installation crews, contractors, landscapers, specialist fees, heavy equipment rentals, materials, obligatory testing, insurance,studio rental and substructures for public safety. “I don’t care if there is a net infusion back into local economies. In fact, as an artist I resent the bulk of the public art money being spent in the community, on the workers who help build and install these projects. They should volunteer their services and materials if they had any civic pride.”

Press Attache AHM intervened brusquely at this moment and hurried Court Painter off to an unscheduled appointment.

 

 

Fire & Fury

Please note: Court Painter originally published the Fire & Fury posting August 10,2017 before that Wolfee in Wolf’s clothing stole the title for his scandalous just published book…Fire & Fury! There oughta be a law!

Original Post August 10,2017

Mooch & Buyers Remorse

In a case of ‘buyer’s remorse’ Court Painter & Studio Chief of Staff A Hardon MacKay have decided the Mooch has got to go. Since his recent hiring, absolutely nothing in the studio can get done except drinkin’, gamblin’, cookin’ and cussin!

 

There was much fun and everyone in the studio picked up some new cuss words! Admittedly it was an important bonding experience for the boys however Court Painter decided there was only room for one alpha type in the operation and “I  *%^&#@@@** ain’t leavin !”

 

The Mooch Stunning Hire!

In the wake of appointing new Studio Chief of Staff A Hardon MacKay , Court Painter expected great things! In a stunning cross border hire AHM poached The Mooch right from under the nose of the White House gang .Court Painter seems particularly giddy. Maybe he’s just excited about having a Chief of Staff who is not only going to establish order in his chaotic studio but can make stunning hires like The Mooch. He’s happy at last to have a great communicator like The Mooch, the boisterous Long Island hedge fund bro who should be a perfect fit for the struggling Court Painter operation.

Studio Chief of Staff A Hardon MacKay Interviews The Mooch